full moon energy!

mmm so grateful for this momennt. today was : waking up energized..running into kitchen, cleaning, laughing, buddha bar, essential oil spraying, laughing, running, some sadness, reassurance, chocolate, loving, seeing judgement, acceptance, kombucha, sweeeet sage on the air, snow, full moon haze.

I have dreams of Big Sur coastline, my spirit is there. I am allowing my spirit to take me there, to garden, to truly HEAL the issues I have been dealing with the past year, the habitual patterns of numbing not wanting to feel emotions completely, depending on people/external circumstances for my own happiness. I create my happiness, I know what is healthy for my soul, for my physical vessel.

I really want to release the ignorance I have over my body sometimes. I want to let go of emotional eating, using food to abuse my body. it is a life-long journey of mine.  I have come to stand stills. Being confused on how to open to help, on how to let go of the food issues.  I know it is a process, and I know the support is out there, and I know I can do it.  Faith, perserverance, stregnth, trust, community.  I pray for this. And I know it takes my SELF to truly stop the patterns, to create new healthy loving vitalistic ways of living fully. Loving fully, BE-ing PRESENT.

Addiction…is not just drugs, alcohol. It is the mind, it is the obsessive quality of running in circles, worrying, hitting walls, co-dependency, it can truly be food, relationships, tv, internet…the addictive mind. The buddhists know about it.

I love you.

I had a co-worker really confront me on my PRESENCe, and spaciness. I live a lot in the future. she brought me to earth. i am grateful for this.